The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Randomize
