He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
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