In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
