You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
