Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
