We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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