all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
