we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
