So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
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