Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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