I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
