Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
