I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
