she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
