Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
