i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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