I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
