I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
only you would photoshop your dick
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
it's great music for shaving your balls
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
