But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize