Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize
