My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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