As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
