I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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