Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize