ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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