.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Randomize
