Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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