oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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