I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize