David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
