Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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