you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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