So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
