can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
