How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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