are you so shy because you have an std?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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