we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
