do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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