Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
