Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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