What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
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