on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
