Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
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