I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
