So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize