apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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