Ambien. No doubt about it.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
