I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
