I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
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