I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize