Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
